Jaye Ware running for Welfare Convener

28 Jan

Crap. I just realised this election is about more than just the four “important” people at the top. There is also a fuckload of various internal EUSA positions. And apparently they will be having campaigns too. Fuckit.

One of those people, and this is apparently a EUSAvicious exclusive (Fuck yeah!), is Jaye Ware. For the sake of taking care of my fucking journalistic integrity I should point out that I haven’t actually confirmed this with Jaye. Or even asked. But who needs first hand sources when one can rely on drunk-out-of-their-minds hacks in bars?

I am unable to find a lot of information, or indeed a picture, of Jaye, but come on. I gave you a fucking exclusive? Isn’t that enough?

What I do know is that Jaye Ware is another one of those people who doesn’t like things being cut, and will probably be running under an anti-cuts banner with the support of the regular fucking group of anti cutters. I have it on some authority that Jaye currently holds a position as a convener for an action group called… wait… what the fuck? That’s a fucking acronym? Seriously? LGBTQIA?!

And EUSA wonder why people find it hard to relate to them.

Despite being in EUSA, Jaye is known not to be entirely happy about all aspects of it. So I guess we might have another candidate running under the “Fuck the system! Vote for me!”-banner.

Other, no doubt annoying, campaigns for Welfare Convener are going to be Calum Hay and Suzy Compton.

I’ll vote for whoever promises to take care of my welfare by making sure my fucking therapist gets fired. Oh, and while you are at it, kill off that fucking Robert Moose guy. I fucking HATE that moose.

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10 Responses to “Jaye Ware running for Welfare Convener”

  1. Booorrrrrrreeeeedddddd January 28, 2011 at 4:06 pm #

    The thing is… eusavicious might be funny as a ranty, Basil Fawlty style response to eusa. There could be an element of fun in over the top streams of eusa rage.

    But why try to pretend you’re not a hack, or that you don’t know anything about eusa? Your information is SO hacky, and your endless pretending to be surprised, or to not know what different things in eusa mean, is really transparent.

    Would it affect your ability to write these repetitive rants if you just admitted you were an anonymous hack? I only ask because its irritating that you pretend to know nothing about an organisation your obviously familiar with.

    Also no outsider would EVER care about these elections so much unless they were really really sad.

    And we all kinda guessed who you are.

    Soz.

    • EUSAvicious January 28, 2011 at 4:38 pm #

      If I weren’t such a dick I’d almost feel sorry for whoever it is “everyone” apparently thinks I am.

  2. Chris Mafanisore January 28, 2011 at 7:33 pm #

    Matthew,

    I’ve got to second the sentiment expressed there. If the blog was readable, it wouldn’t be a problem. However, the inclusion of ‘fucking’ every 7.4 words does not constitute ‘edgy’ – it’s just trying too hard.

    If you were honest about who was actually writing it and had something interesting to say, rather than the thinly-veiled negative campaigning we’ve seen, then it wouldn’t be a problem.

    Come clean and stop perpetuating the myth that student politics are about the most vicious battles over the most insignificant issues.

    That’s part of the reason why EUSA elections have a horrendous turnout. We need candidates who can work together for the benefit of the student body rather than for the CV of those elected.

    If it isn’t Matthew, then it’s clearly someone close to your campaign and it will come out. Don’t hand the nutters ammo so easily.

    • EUSAvicious January 28, 2011 at 8:52 pm #

      Neither Matthew nor anyone on his campaign has anything to do with EUSAvicious in any way.

      I am not going to make a habit of denying identity-rumours, but if it is in fact the case that “everyone” thinks this is the work of Matt’s campaign I feel it would be unfair to him not to categorically state that it isn’t.

      • Chris Mafanisore January 28, 2011 at 9:13 pm #

        I understand we won’t see you revealing your identity any time soon after the negative response it’s received across the EUSA scene, but please explain:

        Why did you choose to position yourself as a ‘normal student’ when it’s clear that you’re part of the organisation?

        Why did Matthew promote it only half an hour after the blog on McAsh was published? Would a patently false opening letter and a profile on Matthew make it look too blantant it was him?

        Anonymous are watching.

      • EUSAvicious January 28, 2011 at 9:25 pm #

        Matthew promoting this blog is news to me. You have to ask him about that.
        And do you seriously think I set up this blog expecting anything but a negative response from the EUSA scene?
        Have you READ this blog?

        If you or anyone else have more “serious” questions or concerns, e-mail me. You may get better answers by e-mail than in comments.

  3. Bildungsroman January 28, 2011 at 9:52 pm #

    Oh what the piss. Why do people even give a flying fuck who actually writes it? As someone who’s not fluent in hacklish I find Eusavicious pretty interesting. Even if it is written by a hack at least it has a semblance of what your average student thinks.

    Jaye doesn’t stand a chance for welfare though.

    • shhh January 30, 2011 at 9:55 pm #

      if you really aren’t a hack, why are you so sure that Jaye doesn’t stand a chance?

      • Bildungsroman January 31, 2011 at 3:27 pm #

        I’m not sure if you realize but candidates do exist outside of the EUSA bubble. Jaye is not a charismatic person. Nice? Sure. But can you imagine them out campaigning? Not so much. Maybe Calum and Suzy are bollocks and Jaye will win but I’d predict no. And I know plenty of students who vote by just picking the most typically attractive person on the ballot. Obviously not a good way to vote but it bodes well for Calum.

        That’s why.

  4. Hazel Louise February 1, 2011 at 12:00 pm #

    Personally, I find it unfair to say that Jaye doesn’t stand a chance! As action group convener they have showed dedication to welfare issues raised by the action group. They have shown that they can stand up for these issues even when they have met hostility. Plus, Jaye with the action group has run some awareness campaigns in their role that were previously untouched by EUSA.

    I am optimistic enough to believe that actually most people will look at a candidates dedication, past experience and manifesto and make their decision based on that.

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